As I drove by and watched a lady plunge her torso all the way up to her waist through a car window to reach the person on the other side of the car and bestow a kiss, I thought, “Wow. That takes determination.” But you’ll find that people in Mexico often engage in heroic contortions in order to greet people properly. Greetings are important. Let me rephrase that. Greetings are very important.

Why? What’s so important that requires someone walking into a meeting and interrupting in order to greet each person individually with a handshake or a kiss? Or stooping from an elliptical machine at the gym and hovering dangerously to kiss a known passerby? Two words: acknowledgement and respect.

From the time children are toddlers, they are taught the importance of acknowledging family, friends and acquaintances with this elemental show of courtesy. It must be individual; a casual collective wave won’t do. The importance of showing each person their due respect shows the relevance of relationships, of fostering and nurturing them as part of the cornerstone of the value system.

Overlooking this important ritual can be tantamount to a slap in the face. There’s a saying, “A nadie se le niega el saludo”, which means, you should never deny anyone a greeting. This saying shows that the greeting is an intrinsic right which recognizes a person’s dignity. Not greeting someone can be interpreted as an act of arrogance, anger or contempt.

I confess, when I was still a newcomer to the culture, I committed my share of faux pas in forgetting to greet friends and acquaintances. This was usually met by a cold shoulder later on, which took me a while to understand, or those who were bolder, would ask me in aggravated voice, “What, did we sleep together?” They would eventually explain to me that it meant that unless you live with someone, you need to greet them properly every time you interact for the first time that day and say farewell when you leave.

Another piece of protocol which was difficult was who greets whom? This took me a while and I finally realized it was not a random occurrence. Rule of thumb, the greeter is last one in, first one out. The one arriving must go around and greet each person, and if that person must leave, they must say farewell individually before exiting. Breaking the rule will result in the reproach, “You left without saying good-bye.”

Some of my foreign clients say to me, “For goodness, sake, Maria, I can’t be bothered with all that nonsense! What a waste of time!” to which I usually reply, ok, but proceed at your own risk. If you know that the people you work with and socialize with hold this ritual dear, as it shows esteem and respect, what’s a few seconds if it will promote good-will? As the saying goes when in Rome…I mean, Mexico…..